THE RAW FOOD LIFE
You may have already heard of the raw food movement that’s sweeping across America, but it’s likely that you haven’t heard the reasons why this diet can be beneficial to your health, nor how to properly and realistically incorporate this diet into your daily routine. Here are some helpful guidelines.
Raw (adj.) – 1. uncooked, 2. in it’s natural state, not yet processed or purified, 3. new to an activity or job and therefore lacking experience or skill.
Contrary to popular belief, the raw food movement isn’t just about how you cook the food. Sure, uncooked foods contain beneficial bacteria and enzymes that aid your digestive and immune system while cooking these foods eliminates these enzymes and extracts nutritional value from the food. But beyond that, the raw food movement is about being open to new things, like shoving slimy uncooked chicken probably teeming with e. coli in your mouth. It’s a state of being. It’s something that people have never done before, and therefore, it must a worthy endeavor. Like a young teen rebelling against his parents, the raw food movement is about innovation, and more importantly, being extreme for the sake of being extreme. As one of the youngest countries in the world, it’s not the rawness of the food. It’s the rawness of our ideas.
- Eat a salad. Make sure not to cook anything. Just eat the salad. However, careful choosing the dressing, as most dressings contain chemical ingredients and sometimes toxic additives. We recommend uncooked beef juices. Squeeze a hunk of meat over your salad. The rounded fat flavors really work well on drenched leaves.
- Try your favorite pasta recipe, but this time, don’t cook the pasta. It may have a different texture, so feel free to eat with your hands. Just dunk them in there and rub ‘em around. Seriously, no one’s going to judge you for this if they haven’t judged you already.
- The raw food movement is about thinking outside the box, so perhaps try over-cooking your food, eating only meat for a week. A charred meat cleanse. Studies show that charred red meat is a major carcinogen, but what are these studies anyway? Next thing you know these studies will be saying that raw food is good for you. What rubbish!
- Finally, ask a family member if they’d be willing to cut off a part of their body so you can try it out. You’re both from the same family, so it’s not like there’s cooties or something. This is a good introduction to the diet, and you will be doing something together.
RAW IN THE PRESENT, AND RAW FOR THE FUTURE
When it comes to a nutrition, it’s very hard to tell what the fuck people are going to come up with next. New theories and surveys are hatched yearly, much like senior theses at liberal arts schools. Just really making up shit. The only way to stay on top of things fully, to be as universally healthy as possible, is to be an early adopter. Never get used to one diet, one routine, one doctrine.
Stay up to date on all food news all the time, but never really question it or read past the first two sentences of any article. As soon as you’re done with the article, also, get yourself to the nearest restaurant/garden/Carls Jr. and adapt it immediately. If it’s right, then your health will actually improve. If it’s wrong, you’ll already be onto the next thing, and it won’t matter, because you’ll be current, you’ll be young, you’ll be raw. And in a field where it’s even beyond the realm of possibility to tell if something is benefiting your health, the only way to measure your health is how you feel. And when you believe something past the point of sensibility, you will always feel good.