a rotten gate hangs
on hinges rusted with time
bound up in ivy
A GUIDE TO BUILDING A HEALTHY RELATIONSHIP, AS TOLD BY A CONSTRUCTION FOREMAN
This guide has a variety of applications including alteration, routine maintenance, and renovation to make for a more suitable and comfortable love life. You may have found that despite having the necessary background experience, your relationship could use modifications that go beyond the system guidelines for obtaining proper strength and stability.
1. FIRST, IMPROVE THE UNDERCOAT: In order to be able to withstand four times the weight of another, you ought to first be able to have a healthy self-supporting scaffold. The general requirements for a confident ego is being able to support your own weight and components on a firm foundation to reduce displacement. Once you have mastered the complexity of the appropriate self-reliant system, you can take on the workload of another.
2. FIND THE BAD CONNECTION: If there isn’t a sign of trouble, but the wire in a wirenut doesn’t stay lined up and becomes twisted, you may have to check, undo, and redo some of your personal gaslighting.
3. BEGIN ROUGHING-IN: If you’re altering your existing relationship, or installing a new girlfriend, you must always present detailed plans of the work you intend to undertake and will likely be inspected as the work progresses. As long as you comply with your partner’s constraints, you won’t impair the stability nor undermine the foundation.
4. WORK COLLECTIVELY: As a general rule, it’s important that all parts of your projective identification do not ruminate into resentment. When estimating the potential, take the blame by directing the bitter energy and irresponsibility of resentment back toward oneself in order to get along or gain certified approval. Don’t use hard words to support the relationship; this will damage the pipelines of communication and must never be used as temporary OR permanent compound solutions for joint tenancy.
5. BE THE J CHANNEL OF THE LAST DRYWALL SHEET: When properly erected and maintained, the longevity of your relationship will far outweigh the time spent on laying down the groundwork!
Photographs found at a flea market.
SREENWRITING LESSONS (FOR YOUNGER SIBLINGS)
One of the first rules of conventional storytelling is that every part of the story should exist for a reason. This probably reminds you of growing up with your asshole older sister, hoping that each painful setback will ultimately bring you a peaceful ending. Like after she goes away to college maybe, who knows. The same is true in screenwriting, where the demand for pathos and meaning is somehow even greater. Therefore, every scene should exist to tell us what is happening (the SCENE), and also show us something about the character (Reason). Again, this is not unlike getting together around the dinner table, where the simplest of statements probably contain at least 10 other implications that you‘ll have to deal with.
Here are some examples:
SCENE 1—The main character asks if she can borrow her mother’s clothes for a date.
Reason: This shows how the main character not only feels more comfortable wearing her mom‘s clothes than her own, but that she’s really looking forward to the date.
Reason your sister might make up: This shows how the main character is totally selfish and doesn’t treat Mom with respect. Remember that purple blouse that I gave Mom at Christmas? Yeah, she totally just like stole it, and now Mom probably doesn’t even fit in it anymore. It’s total B.S.
SCENE 2—At a nice family dinner, an older girl tells her parents to pass the salad. She picks out only the grape tomatoes and cheese and eats that.
Reason: This shows that the older girl is an extremely picky eater and also isn’t very polite, since she doesn’t say “thank you” or “please.”
Reason your sister might make up: I bet Jessie’s so jealous of me eating so healthy. Look at all that rice on her plate. What a fatty!
SCENE 3—The family unloads the car while dropping the older sibling off at college. When younger girl takes out a cardboard box filled with pink picture frames, the older sibling chides her, “Don’t touch my stuff!”
Reason: This shows that the older sibling is very protective of her possessions and perhaps stressed out, being in a new setting.
Reason your sister might make up: I never expected I was going to miss her this badly. Now that it’s time to go, I have no idea how to show it. Give me the box. I’ll keep it safe for later.